After Losing Her Husband, a Woman Learned from a Nurse That Another Woman Had Been Visiting Him for Several Weeks – A Few Days Later, the Visitor Came to Her House and Said, ‘So You Don’t Know What He Left You, Do You?’

“It should be sometimes.”

“What does that mean?”

“It means if someone needed help tomorrow, you’d forget to ask whether you could afford to give it.”

“That sounds like a compliment.”

“It scares me.”

You already have enough to carry.

“Why?”

“Because you never know when to let someone else be the problem.”

I thought he deserved one corner of his life where cancer – and I – weren’t watching him.

That decision became the first thing I regretted after he died.

***

Five weeks later, he got much worse.

Sounds like a compliment.

I held his hand.

“You look scared,” he whispered.

“So do you.”

“I’m allowed.”

“So am I.”

The first thing I regretted.

He almost smiled. “You’ll be okay.”

“Don’t say that.”

“You will.”

“No, Jack.”

“Promise me you’ll keep going.”

You look scared.

“I don’t know how.”

“You’ll figure it out. You always do.”

Those were the last clear words he said to me.

***

Three days later, I sat at the kitchen table with a funeral bill and two overdue notices.

The woman from the bank cleared her throat. “There isn’t enough left to cover next month.”

Promise me you’ll keep going.

“I know.”

“And the loan against the house…”